"Two Things Create a Woman, Pretty Dresses and Love Letters"

Gustave Flaubert, a mid to late 19th-century French author, is most well known for his first published novel, Madame Bovary. While in his 20s, Flaubert fell in love with Louise Colet, a poet whom he never married, but who nonetheless seemed to shape much of what he wrote and more generally speaking, his willingness (or lack thereof), in the years that followed, to seek anything beyond platonic relationships. He is on my mind this morning for three reasons: 1) Vivian Swift quotes him in her travel journal, When Wanderers Cease to Roam - one of my favorite reads of all time; 2) I have been thinking about the sustainability of love - why do some people stay with us no matter how circumstances change?; and 3) after doing a little research, it seems Flaubert, a skilled author who could legitimately be classified both as romantic and realist, was painstakingly devoted to finding just the right word. - you have probably heard me mention that semantics will be the death of me.

The quote of interest: "He had never seen anything to compare with her. What was her name, her home, her life, her past? He longed to know the furniture in her room, all the pretty dresses she had ever worn." Sentimental Education, 1869

Today, let's all assume that someone is inescapably thinking this exact same thing about each of us.
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Orange is the new green.
...
Butternut & Sweet Potato Bisque
Servings: 4
This sounds a little fancy, but trust me, it isn't. The soup is both delicious and fairly easy to make (obviously, this is just my opinion, but I honestly think it would please a diverse array of palettes; the flavors subtly blend, tastefully avoiding the sometimes inevitable "love it or hate it" response to less commonly used vegetables). Additionally, if you're like me and are yearning for fall, this might sooth your summer heartache. Plus, it's orange. ...:)

Ingredients
1 1/2 tsp. olive oil
1/2 onion, chopped
4 cups peeled and cubed butternut squash
1 medium sweet potato, cooked, peeled and cubed (I used new potatoes)
1 cup corn kernels, fresh or frozen
2 tbsp. minced fresh ginger (I used dry)
1 1/2 tsp. brown sugar
1 tsp. ground coriander
1/2 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp. pepper

Directions:
1. Preheat oven to 375. Cut squash lengthwise and scoop out seeds and gooey stuff (as if cleaning a pumpkin). Sprinkle butter or olive oil, salt and pepper on both halves. Put about an inch of water in a baking pan and then place squash, cut side up, in the pan. Bake for about 75 minutes. If using sweet potato, cook at the same time (since I used the small, red new potatoes, I just peeled and cooked them on the stovetop about 40 minutes into the squash cook time).
2. When the squash and sweet potato have cooled a bit, scoop out the good stuff and put the peelings in the compost pile.

3. In a large saucepan, heat oil over medium-high heat. Add onion and cook, stirring, until it begins to brown. I also added celery...just because I really like celery.

4. Add squash, sweet potato, corn, ginger, brown sugar, coriander, salt, pepper, and 3 cups water; bring to a boil. Reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer until squash is tender (15-20 minutes).

5. With slotted spoon, transfer solids to food processor or blender and process to a smooth puree. Return puree to saucepan and stir to blend with liquid remaining in pan. Serve hot. (You might consider adding sour cream, cheese, fresh herbs, or cream fraiche on top). Served in an oddly-shaped bowl that I made in a wheel-throwing class and alongside fresh tomatoes from Andy's garden and a couple of pieces of Mom's sourdough bread.
***
Knock, knock?

Who's there?

Orange.

Orange, who?

Orange you glad you aren't the 13-year-old daughter of this driver?
***
Orange Slice Cookies
I recommend this recipe - the dough has an easy-to-work-with consistency, the cookies definitely have a unique flavor, but are quite tasty (especially right out of the oven), and there is a versatility about them that escapes denser, chocolaty desserts (could be an after-supper dessert with a glass of milk or a quick breakfast alongside tea or coffee). And, to state the obvious, it's hard to go wrong with brown sugar, shortening, butter, coconut, and gummy balls of sugar-coated candy. The dancing fruit on the package, a welcomed act of deceit that just may coerce you into believing that rays of sunshine and Vitamin C are the key ingredients, is an added bonus.

Ingredients:
1/2 cup light brown sugar, firmly packed
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup shortening
1/4 cup butter
1 eggs
1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon baking powder
1/8 teaspoon salt
1 cup quick cooking oats
1 cup orange slice candies, finely snipped (If you figure out an easy way to cut orange slices, let me know)
1/2 cup flaked coconut

Directions:
In a large mixing bowl, cream sugars with shortening and butter until light and fluffy. Add eggs and vanilla extract; beat well. In a separate bowl, combine flour, baking soda, baking powder, and salt. Stir to blend. Stir dry mixture into the creamed mixture. Stir in oats, orange slice candy, and coconut. Shape into 1-inch balls. Place on a greased cookie sheet. Bake at 350° for 10 to 12 minutes (I baked mine about 18), until lightly browned. Remove to wire rack to cool.
*In theory, this should make 36 cookies; I ended up with 26 or 27 I think.

We Still Need A Chairman for the Beard Growing Contest

And, my long-held desire and well-intentioned scheme to make Burkesville a little more Stars Hollow-esque begins. ...

You might remember me mentioning Gilmore Girls on here before - the quality character development, the witty writing, the love stories of interest. I'm fairly certain, however, that when I have discussed in the past, I've neglected the one component that inspires viewers to care about individual characters, specific scripts, and the weekly plots (Ever type or say a word and it just looks or sounds wrong to you even though you know you spelled/said it correctly? "Plots" looks funny to me). I don't think I've ever really explored the sense of community in Stars Hollow, the fictitious town where these relationships are built and these smartly sarcastic conversations take place.

Because this is a t.v. show and because I know some of you are thinking "she does know this town doesn't exist, right?" I will keep my metaphorical and psychoanalytical explanations in check. I just want to briefly mention why I have said, since I started watching this series, "One day I want to live in a town just like this." In Stars Hollow, people attend town meetings where everything from the town troubadour to building permits for historic renovations is discussed. There is a town troubadour. People buy makeup and stationary at the local shops on the square. Diners used to be hardware stores. There are festivals every month. It always seems like fall. People walk when they need to get somewhere. There is a local theater (a projector in someone's house, comfy couches and a few chairs), a dance studio, and a used bookstore. There are entrepreneurs and dreamers just as there are mechanics and market owners. People are sarcastic and occasionally surly, but never mean. Characters don't have to leave the town to seem completely fulfilled.

When I attended the Burkesville Bicentennial organizational meeting last Friday, it felt a little like fall to me. I love that so many people, and people representing a wide swath of interests, professions, and ages, cared enough to come. I enjoyed the funny jabs at one another when discussing possible chairmen for the stagecoach, muzzleloading, and clogging committees. I appreciated that most people seemed to know me even though I haven't lived in Burkesville (full-time) since high school. I was reminded of all the talent and skill represented in our community. I got to talk about tasks and activities with Misty Dubre, a high school classmate - and the local Zumba instructor extraordinaire - in ways we haven't since 1998. I, with great pleasure, was forced to remember late summer nights watching people like Lori Melton, Carol Cary, and LaCosta Smith perform on the Cumberland Queen. I had and have the chance to help plan a festival.

I will have more information on this festival (which will be held in late October) as well as the Bluegrass Festival (mid-September) in the coming months. If anyone is interested, there is another Bicentennial meeting on Thursday at noon at JD's Restaurant (used to be the gas station at the intersection of 90 and south 61).
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On Friday, I also came across a genuine Cumberland County gem. And by "came across," I mean I went in after Leigh Ann told me both who the owner was and why I should stop by; I believe it was something to the effect of "I know how you love to pilfer [or maybe it was piddle]"...both in fact quite accurate. Well, let me tell you, even if Freda Crawford wasn't family, I would still, without hesitation, go back to Main Street 210. This somewhat unassuming consignment and retail store in the Houchens complex is such a welcomed addition to the Cumberland County business community. The shop, which opened in July 2009, is much larger than the storefront suggests; Freda, and her sister, Robin, have tastefully decorated and arranged (there is plenty to look at, but also plenty of room to walk - a rarity in similar shops) five rooms with new, vintage, and consignment items. They have furniture (quirky, unique pieces, but very traditional cabinets, tables, and bookcases as well), a huge collection of dishes and china, home decor odds and ends, and jewelry and apparel accessories. Trust me, take the time to go in and explore...you'll like what you see.

Hours:
Wednesday-Friday: 10-6, Saturday: 9-2

Contact Information:
210 North Main Street
Burkesville, KY 42717
270-864-1653 begin_of_the_skype_highlighting 270-864-1653 end_of_the_skype_highlighting

Here's a few shots from inside the shop. The captions are taken from the transcript of the informal interview Freda was kind enough to grant me.
What was your motivation to open Main Street 210?
For about 15 years I have wanted to open a furniture consignment store just to offer our fine local citizens with some quality items with a cost that is affordable. Our mission is to give back to the community. Burkesville has been good to us.
How often to you get new stuff in?
We receive merchandise weekly.
What types of pieces are you typically looking for?
We look for items that people really can use, or as we say "needful" items..ha!
Do you allow local people to bring in stuff and you resale?
Yes, local people are our first concern. We just ask that items be clean and in good shape. We have advertised in Albany and Columbia. We love new consignors. Also, we would like to add that calling for an appointment to bring items in would be great.
Any other comments you'd like to include?
If anyone is looking for a particular item, we keep a running list of that, so when it comes it we give that person a call to see if it's the right fit.

The Baha Men May Have Won a Grammy, but that doesn't mean saying "Who Let the Dogs Out" is clever or funny

Lucy and Willie showing Isabella a thing or two. C'mon, admit it, this is cute.

I often hear people say, "You never know how much you'll love your kids until you have them." (I may have, in all actuality, heard that once or twice in my life; hyperbole never hurt anyone). Well, I don't know about kids, but I sure feel that way about my utterly untrained, of unknown breed, completely cost ineffective dogs, Lucy and Willie Turner. Or, as also affectionately referred: "Luce" (pronounced "loose"), "Lucy Lou," "Lucy Baby," "Willis," "Will Pickle," "Mr. Pickleton," "Pickle Sticks."

I grew up around dogs. But, these were "outside dogs." Even some of our favorites - Dottie (bet you can't guess the origin of that name), Butterscotch, Emma, Waffle - ventured in the house only when Leigh Ann, Adrienne, or I created a diversion with spilled milk or a fistfight. On the rare occasion, said distraction provided just enough time for the pup of choice to stealthily tiptoe, with reckless abandon, past the house despot. Otherwise, Jackie was having none of it. Mom didn't care that Waffle was afraid of thunderstorms or that we liked Dottie more than we liked each other.

Fast forward 20 years:
- Lucy, Willie, and Tucker (Mom and Dad's Yorkie-poo) occasionally take up too much space in the bed.
- Lucy and Willie have a permanent water bowl that attaches to the back of the passenger seat. And seat belts.
- Tucker goes to a place called "Doggone Classy" for monthly groomings. I had Lucy's teeth professionally cleaned.
- I take Lucy and Willie to puppy day care on days when Heartland is holding themed parties...Examples: "Superbowl Extravagance," "Easter Egg Hunt," "Fall Festival."
- One of my favorite Christmas pictures of all time is of Santa holding Lucy and Willie (who, naturally, are in Elf costumes).
- Tucker gets his food microwaved, allowing the expensive wet dog food to coat the also expensive, dry dog food.
- At the last vet visit, Dr. Rowland, who is one of the nicest men you can imagine, had to fuss on me a bit. Lucy had gained some weight (I shall just leave it at "some") because I had been giving her excessive homemade dog treats and table scraps (Is it still considered "scraps" if the food is in fact cooked solely for them? So I may scramble them a few eggs now and then, big deal).

Bet Dottie, Scotch, and Emma read L,W, and T's Facebook statuses and also think "oh, shut the hell up".

I truly love my dogs like they are my children. I love to see them get excited when I drive up. I love that I can fuss on them and then five minutes later, all is forgotten and they want to sit in my lap. I love that Willie gives "good Willie bites" first thing in the morning. I love that Lucy was my first dog. I love that they love Isaiah and he, them. I love that they really do seem to think of Mom and Dad as Nonna and Pa. I appreciate that they have been with me through some of the most horrible moments of my life, always cuddling with me when intuiting that I was sad or hurt. I love that they have shared most of the best moments.
This was discovered laying beside Lucy and Willie's food bowls a few days ago. I first suspected that someone had helped them with it. I then remembered how smart and capable they are.

So, today is a tribute to Lucy and Willie Turner.







It seems many of the Pillow Book followers are also "dog people." Here is Alexus and her dog, Buster. I adore these pictures.


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Dessert for those trying to use up stuff in their freezer and/or refrigerator

Ingredients:
Puff pastry crust
Peach & Strawberry preserves
Cheesecake filling of your choice (I just grabbed a recipe online)
Crushed almonds/pecans

Directions/Rationale:
I decided to throw this together because 1) I had a puff pastry and some cream cheese that needed to be used and 2) I had homemade peach and strawberry preserves that were too delicious not to share.

Preheat oven to 400. Spray muffin pan with non-stick spray.

I rolled out the puff pastry crust and used a pizza cutter to divide into 12 squares. I then shaped each piece into the muffin pan. Egg wash. Bake for 20 minutes or so (golden brown).

Remove crusts from pan and allow to cool. Put spoonful of preserve/jam in each cup and refrigerate.

Put together cheesecake filling and bake. (I just put mine in a buttered pie plate - no crust).

Allow cheesecake to cool. Remove pastry crusts from refrigerator. Use ice cream scoop to dollop cheesecake mixture on top of crust and preserves. Top with nuts of choice.

Refrigerate for at least 2 hours (I actually put mine in the freezer for a bit).

My Mind Told Me I Should Proceed With Caution, But My Heart Said Go Ahead and Make a Bid on That

A brief background story, followed by a few scholarly conclusions, capped with sage words of advice...

While I 1) have vast experience with the CCHS radio fundraiser and 2) I did attend a car auction once with dad and Tack Branham (when I got the little, blue Ford Ranger I drove in high school), I had never been to a property auction prior to this past weekend. Andy had been planning on attending the Casey Fork extravaganza for several days (looking for bike equipment), but I was a little hesitant; I spend too much money when I go pilfering through the Dollar Store (Pam has even commented on my random purchases before - last visit it was a plunger, cereal, and conditioner I think). What would the excitement of an auction inspire me to load into Lucy and Willie's Elantra playground? But alas, my desire to both clean my house and to squelch buying irrationality were both eclipsed by the lure of Colonel Joe's voice. Andy called, asking for lunch money (the Mennonite community sold pies, homemade ice cream, BBQ chicken and pork plates that looked ridiculously good) and the auction called, asking for my unadulterated support.

Conclusions:
1. Bryant Realty can hold an auction like nobody's business. There were a ton of items up for bid, but Jeremy, Jeffrey, Ryan, and Joe got through things quickly, in organized fashion, and seemed to have a little fun with it. The two ladies in the number and "check-out" trailer were friendly and efficient.
2. Four big saw horses for $5 is a steal.
3. I should've got into a bidding war with the joker who got the dog house for $20. I don't care that he was roughly 12 years old.
4. Who knew a tiller would go for about $2000? I realize that's not a conclusion.
5. I should've spent less time walking around looking at garden tools, tandem bikes, and kitchen furniture and more time eating pecan pie.

Advice:
Auctions are awesome. That is all.
***
Andy picked up lots of necessities. Here's a sampling (I will then follow with a description of the most exciting purchase...)
A feeder and waterer for the chicken coop. I think.
Basically a hand tiller for gardening. Some guy tried to bid against him. Yeah, better luck next time, fool.
I have a Wal-Mart bike that has been ridden maybe two times in the past year. This apparently is a really nice bike rack that good ol' purple passion will never be on.
Who doesn't love a grab bag?! Andy got this box o' bike tools for $5.

AND NOW, for the most exciting expenditure of the day...
A PALLET FULL OF BEEKEEPING EQUIPMENT!!!! Do either of us have bees? No.
Would love to hear your thoughts: What do you think is running through his mind?
I urged him to also purchase the sign. Once again, necessity. Oh, and by the way, if you go to www.honey.com you can read about the Save the Honey Bear campaign as well as get a good recipe for canning peaches. That's not a joke or euphemism.
These are obviously the sanded wood implements that secure the combs to the foundations and supers. Or, they are the wood things that I thought looked like a cute city skyline.
This seems important.
Success!

And now, a little instructional video...

"It All Started With Two Brothers, an Old Van, and a Dream"

Anytime one feels as though they must eat their words, I suppose the first step is simply acknowledgement of wrongdoing. And so, I begin today with an admission, a cathartic explanation that will surely make me seem like the most surly 29 year old you know. ...

In the past, when I've seen people post things like "Loving Life!!!" or "I am so blessed!!!!" or "[Insert any really positive comment that also includes a heart made from a 3 and a greater-than symbol]," my immediate, though, perhaps to my credit, usually unspoken, response was "oh, shut the hell up." No, nevermind, that's mean even if I never said it.

BUT, as I sit here this morning I feel inclined to use some mathematical symbols and exclamation points. It has just been a really fun week. And thus, to make amends to all of those whom I have secretly cursed, rolled my eyes at, and wished mud thrown upon, I will do those things that I typically hate: 1) use cliche-filled sentences - This is me eating crow, finishing with humble pie, and then swallowing alongside my pride.; 2) be optimistic - A bunch more people will add to Monday's story to which only Andy, Kristi, and Mandi have contributed thus far.; 3) while pictorially describing my week, I will be sure to incorporate a bunch of grammatical marks that will most likely annoy me again next week.: ...
Early in the week, Andy and I accidentally stumbled across this jack-of-all-trades store in Columbia. I don't remember the road number, but if coming from Burkesville, go 3/4 way around the square and follow that road for about 2 miles or so. It will be on your right. If I've said "I really wish I could lift weights, buy a Jesus-themed bracelet, and eat a buffalo burger all at the same place" once, I've said it a million times. (Oh, and the food actually was fantastic - he had a buffalo slawburger and I had the grilled chicken/pepperjack/pineapple sandwich. !!!)
Every time I go in a gas station, anything with absolutely no nutritional value seems like the perfect snack - hot pockets, push-ups, honey buns, slush puppies, yoohoos, coconut donuts. When we stopped at the gas station by the Columbia Wal-Mart, however, I, for the first time, found a little treat that is both marginally good for me and super delicious. What a day. I <3 chocolate milk.
In the middle of the week, Andy and I hauled hay for a friend of his in western Kentucky. Although I grew up on a farm, never in my life have I had the pleasure of loading hay onto a wagon and then arranging said hay in a loft that is far too high for my tiny-bit-scared-of-heights sensibilities. But, you know what? I actually kind of enjoyed it. If you get a chance, go back and read Caroline's post from a few months ago about the joy of working with your hands, getting a bit dirty, and feeling like you've accomplished something. Getting paid really well and having some nice battle scars didn't hurt either (because I refused to wear long sleeves, fearful of funny tan lines. ...)



After playing lots of Wii and wasting a few hours on the Internet yesterday, we decided to preserve some stuff from his garden. A brief trip to Whipples and a good dish washing of his great grandmother's canner later, we began pickling okra and banana peppers. While this is the basic recipe that we decided to use, we did add some secret ingredients that may - because I have vowed to be super excited and optimistic - make it even more awesome than the recipe creators imagined!!!!

PICKLED OKRA
4 or 4 1/2 lbs. sm. okra pods
7 cloves garlic
7 hot peppers
7 tsp. dill seeds
1 qt. vinegar
1 c. water
1/2 c. pickling salt

Wash okra well. Drain and set aside. Place 1 clove garlic and 1 hot pepper into each of 7 hot sterilized pint jars. Pack jars firmly with okra, leaving 1/2 inch head space; add 1 teaspoon dill seed to each. Combine vinegar, water, and salt in a large saucepan; bring to a boil and pour over okra. Screw metal bands on tightly. Process 10 minutes in a boiling water bath. Let pickles stand at least 5 weeks before opening. This is really hot. You may want to cut the amount of spices used.
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And, I leave you today with a reference to Monday's blog entry. As I mentioned at the beginning of the post, the inspiration for a collaborative story came from Mandi Wheat and the little ditties we would create in high school English class. Well, lo and behold if Miss Wheat did not come across one of our originals. She emailed me this last night...:)

It was Freaky & Scary but Oh So Cool
Story by Senior English Class 1997/1998

(Corey Garner) It seems like it was the day before tomorrow when it all happened. It was sort of freaky and scary but oh so cool.

(Mandi Wheat) I walked home after school and unlocked the door. I walked in, sat down with a Pepsi and a bag of chips and watched the Greased Pig Channel.

(? Not sure?) As the show came on, a squiggly chill of satisfaction filled my once empty soul. The show made my toes wiggle along with my monkey shivering.

(Liza Turner) All of the sudden, Mr. Bright and Janet Jackson, dressed head to toe in flannel leotards, busted through my door and shouted Got Milk? I got really mad and told them to shut their big, fat, ugly mouths and then shot them in the elbow because they caused me to miss the ending of Run for the Roses…Greased Pig Style.

(? Not sure…Either Lindsey or Melissa…I think) After they ran off I settled down to some re-runs, of course on the best channel. (Greased Pig) I began to feel sleepy and soon I was dreaming. I was dancing like a chicken to “You can’t touch this.” It was so real the lights were flashing and I was a star!

Just for kicks:) - http://www.lifeisgood.com/

Not Cheating Wasn't A Matter of Principle. I Was Busy.

I thought I would try something today inspired by 1) my dear friend, Mandi Wheat and 2) my own writing deficiencies. Mandi and I had the good fortune of having Mr. Jon Frederick (and Pillow Book contributor, Melissa Ashby, our Senior year) as our high school English teacher. Most days we were surely serious, studiously soaking in the literature, the poetry, the alliteration exercises and grammatical skill-builders thrown our way. But then there were the vocabulary book days. While some wasted time with last minute cheating, others, Mandi and myself included - in fact, we may or may not have been the ringleaders - chose to make much more creative/super productive use of those 15 minutes. We would write a sentence or two on a piece of notebook paper about whatever we thought funny or interesting or nonsensical at the time, pass the paper to neighbors - I have no shame, I'm fairly certain that Kristen, Lindsey, Melissa, Triva, Kristi, Scott, Corey, and Justin all participated - and encouraged respective conspirator to add another sentence or two to the story. I can remember sitting in my desk, finished product in hand, trying to keep my shoulders from shaking, the universal (and invariably subtle) "I'm not supposed to be laughing, but I really want to" move. I'm sure Mr. Frederick had no idea; 17 year olds tend to be really inconspicuous and crafty... So, when Mandi commented on Saturday's Pillow Book entry, these instances of delinquency came to mind.

You know, it's funny, when I started this post I really didn't think Mandi and my writing deficiencies had anything in common. A paragraph in, however, and it is glaringly obvious. It is Mandi's fault that I have never attempted to write fiction and really have read very little. While we were organizing the collected musings of the class of 1998, Mr. Frederick was probably giving a masterfully persuasive oratory on the joys and intricacies of said genre. Thanks a lot, Mandi. ...

Well, in an attempt to make amends - both to Mr. Frederick, who in all sincerity, was one of the best teachers I have had at any level, and to the Pillow Book readers who appreciate fiction, but who have to constantly listen to my memoir-style take on books, music, recipes, and daily life - I have decided to challenge myself a bit today. I am going to start a story (maybe a paragraph instead of a sentence this time) and then ask you, in Mandi and Liza style, to add to it. The last person gets to come up with a title fitting for the completed narrative. Now, this is the way to do fiction.
Come to think of it, perhaps a genuine "thank you" is owed...:)

[Title]
She used to hate it when her mom would open the screen door and half yell, half shriek any of the three phrases that if one or two words were changed, were exactly the same thing. She hated it because the used-to-be-blue, now kind of speckled gray, door made an annoying sound when it closed. More importantly, though, she hated it because her mom had no creativity. Fussing wasn't bad because she inevitably felt ashamed by what she had done or said. It wasn't a nuisance because her mother's words suddenly sparked some magic state of enlightenment that she would then feel obligated to act upon. It bothered her because it rarely entertained her. Where was the stuttering to make fun of? The wild references thrown in for dramatic effect? The ridiculous hyperbole that yearned for a good eye-rolling? She wanted "If I ever catch you doing [XYZ] again, I'm must going to take that [looks around for something of value] Ford Taurus (I suppose "value" is relative) and set it on fire with my breathe and make you put it out with bubbles and pillows" and all she ever got was one of the same three phrases. Every time.

Stupid Pickles Better Be Worth It

Last week Alexus sent me a web link that has occupied and intrigued me for days. As so simply, yet artfully, described on the site, Smith Magazine "is a home for storytelling. We believe everyone has a story, and everyone should have a place to tell it." The Six-Word Memoir Project, in both book and e-zine form, is manifestation of this creative mission. From this page, you can check out recent submissions (updated daily) or browse by categories like "Family, Love, Wrong, Life, Thought, Art," etc: http://www.smithmag.net/sixwords/memoirs.php. What would you say if you had to condense one day, one month, one life into six words?

In addition to the title, I might think, or maybe even whisper, these...
Glad we went for ice cream.
Things don't happen for a reason.
Going home made me happy again.
Willie is a bully but funny.
Isabella makes me think I could.
Sing Indian Outlaw with me loudly.
There will never be enough time.
Very few people really know me.
Curtains don't have to be perfect.
I won't look back and wonder.
Should've included littering on unawesome list.
My friends have such different lives.
I miss regularity but need flexibility.
Others will always question my decisions.
I wish I really enjoyed exercising.
Coffee is better at others' homes.
My mind can never sit still.
Realizing my family isn't the norm.
It's okay to feel crazy sometimes.
_____________________________________________________
A few notes about my sure-to-be-mediocre Bread and Butter Pickles...

* I found the recipe on the wikiHow page, not in a great, great grandmother's recipe book that would in theory be tinted yellow by age and stained with remnants of deliciously fattening goodies that had escaped a cast iron dutch oven.
* The cucumbers were a community effort. A few did come from my raised bed, but they now happily coexist in three pint jars alongside prize winners from Andy's garden and where ever T.J. found his.
* The recipe I provide below is directly from the web page. However, I tweaked mine a bit. I started with 8 cucumbers and adjusted the remaining ingredients based on what I thought seemed appropriate ratios. The end result was 3 pint jars of pickles.
* I didn't have celery seed, so in addition to the turmeric and mustard seed, I used a pickling spice and a store-bought Bread and Butter Pickle mix. I probably also did a few other things that I can't remember right now.
* Make sure you have tongs with which to lift the jars in and out of the hot water. After I, and the dishtowel that I used to transport the pickles, turned a jar over in the pot, Mom decided that she would just got back to her house and grab some lifter-tong-things.
* I'm glad I tried this. It was definitely rewarding to see the finished product on my counter, BUT, unless they are pretty damn good, I'm not sure I will be doing pickles again anytime soon. If so, I will make sure that I have enough cucumbers to do more than three jars.

Ingredients:
6 quarts pickling cucumbers, thickly sliced
1 quart onions, sliced
*First soakbrine of 1/2 cup salt to 4 quarts water to cover

Pickling liquid:
6 cups vinegar
6 cups sugar
1 teaspoon celery seed
1 tablespoon turmeric
1 teaspoon mustard seed

Directions:
1. Obtain pickling cucumbers. Grow your own, or ask around at produce stands or farmers' markets in late summer. Pickling cucumbers are smaller than most salad cucumbers, perhaps 1 to 1 1/2 inches in diameter and 3 to 6 inches long. Plan that 6 to 7 medium pickling cucumbers, or about one pound, sliced, will yield about 3 cups. Thus, for six quarts of sliced cucumbers, you will need about 8 pounds of cucumbers.

2. Wash the cucumbers thoroughly and slice them thickly, about 1/4 inch thick. Do not peel them. Measure the sliced cucumbers until you have about 6 quarts. Cut out any bad spots as you go.

3. Slice the onions. Leave them in half-rings, or if you prefer, aim for bite-sized lengths.

4. Prepare brine for the first soak using 1/2 cup of salt for every 4 quarts of water. Cover the cucumber and onion mixture in this brine. Let the mixture soak for three hours.

5. Sterilize at least a dozen canning jars by boiling them in water for 10 minutes. If you prepare them ahead of time, store them upside-down on a clean towel, covered by another clean towel.

6. Drain the salt water out of the onion and cucumber mixture and discard it.

7. Prepare the pickling liquid. Bring the vinegar, sugar, and spices to a boil in a large saucepan or pot. Then, add the drained vegetables to the mixture and bring the combination to a boil.

8. Prepare the seals. Boil about an inch of water in the bottom of a wide saucepan. Remove the saucepan from heat and place the jar lids individually into the water. Let them sit for a minute or two. Do this immediately prior to use.

9. Pack the cucumbers and onions into the sterilized jars. Leave 1/2 inch of head space (space between the top of the food and the jar rim). Pour the hot pickling liquid over the vegetables, leaving 1/2 inch of head space. Stir the pickling liquid as you go to keep the spices mixed in.

10. Remove any air bubbles from within the jar using a knife (ideally a long, slender plastic one, to avoid harming the food or the jar).

11. Wipe the jar rim with a damp, clean cloth to remove any residue. Use a lid wand to lift the seals out of the hot water. Center the seal on the rim of the jar. Screw on the ring so that it is snug but do not over-tighten. (The idea is to contact the wax sealing surface firmly without displacing it altogether.)

12. Place the filled jars in a water-bath canner or a large stock pot, using a rack to prevent direct contact between the bottom of the pot and the jars. Fill the canner with hot water until the tops of the jars are at least an inch below the surface of the water.

13. Bring the canner full of water and jars to a boil and boil for 15 minutes, adding more time if you are at high altitude.

14. Remove the jars from the boiling water and place them on an old towel in a sheltered area to cool overnight. The next day, check the seals by pressing down in the center. The seal should not move up and down or make noise when pressed.

15. Notice that if the jars are sticky, wait until they have cooled completely, at least 24 hours. Clean the sealed jars with dish soap in room-temperature water and label them with the contents and the date. Allow the jars to dry thoroughly before storing them.