Wednesday, May 7, 2014

"Solitude is blessed."

I finally did it.

Goodbye sliding keyboard phone. Goodbye keys that don't work and thus make my texts illegible. Goodbye surprise presents, ranging from twin decorated tin cans to an old Blackberry, that have been dropped off at the library to both mock and assist. Goodbye all Facebook suggestions to upgrade like a normal person.

Samsung Freeform! You are a much nicer non-smart phone than I had!

That's right; I refuse to cave until phone companies absolutely make me.
Here is why I refuse to get a smart phone:
1. I don't want to be like 95% of the people I know with smart phones. I don't want to be scrolling all the time. I don't want to have my phone out at dinner or when I'm with friends. I want to pay attention to people when they're talking.  I am already distracted enough; I don't need one more thing to fiddle with....and I'm on no delusional high horse; if I had it, I would use it. Hell, I've wasted HOURS watching America's Next Top Model marathons.  My willpower is not that strong.
2. I don't want everything to be easy. I like stopping to ask for directions (i.e. "get a fountain drink"). I like finding recipes in actual cookbooks and taking pictures with an actual camera and reading actual books.  I like trying to figure things out (same reason I am often hesitant to use a calculator) instead of just punching something in and relying on someone else to give me an answer. We are getting increasingly lazy and dependent; I want to prevent or stall that as long as possible.
3. There are other things I would rather spend the money on.
4. I think Louis C.K makes a couple of great points: A) Just because it's available, doesn't mean we have to do it. B) We rely on technology in part because of an inability to be alone.
Speaking of which...
I love this video, not only because it validates my loner tendencies, but because it reminds me to really be present in my life....and to do things like go to an unknown-to-me city and just roam.  I'm not going to lie and say that living alone is always easy. It's not. Sometimes I get stuck in my own head, the silence around me accelerating a medley of "what if"s. Sometimes I just want to cook supper for someone. Sometimes I wish I had kids' ball uniforms to wash.  For the most part, though, I embrace my solitude. I love going to movies alone. It has never bothered me to eat at restaurants alone. I like imagining all the things I can do, all the places I can go, and all the things I can try...primarily because I have few restraints. I like walking into a house that looks exactly like it did when I left in the morning. I like not having to compromise.  None of this is to suggest that I have no desire to be a part of a family unit again sometime or that I am unwilling to relinquish some freedom (I was very fortunate to live in that world for a while)...only that being alone and being lonely are not the same for me.
I like this a lot.


  1. Enjoy this article! I have a smartphone and I am very glad that I do! However, I am not typical and generally hate 'those other people' who use smartphones! Those people who sit at a table, have nothing to say, check mail, messages, chat, look at pictures, FB, etc. When I travel--and that is often--it really helps me stay in touch and to not miss something that might be really important. I do all the things above that other people do, just in the privacy of my hotel room. When I meet friends and talk to others, the phone is locked away in my bag! Willpower is everything!! Keep up the great blog!

  2. PS--I love my quality time alone everyday! I can get things done and read a lot!

    1. Thank you so much for reading and for the thoughtful comments, Jamie. It always humbles me to know that someone who has done, and is doing, such neat things would take the time to read my ramblings. P.S. I'm glad to know you're not one of "those people.":)